Vacation Bible School

Anybody out there remember Vacation Bible School?  I grew up with that as a kid, and I'm glad.  I remember ceremonially marching in to the little country church carrying the American Flag and the Christian Flag.  I remember singing songs with hand motions, and making crafts out of popsicle sticks and macaroni noodles.  I remember playing kickball and eating homemade ice cream straight out of the churn.  And I remember learning bible verses and more about my Savior.  I remember "Commencement" and performing little skits for the congregation that we had rehearsed all week.  I'm thankful for those childhood memories, and for all the adults who served as teachers.

I'm all grown up now, and its my turn to give back.  My big city church calls it "Camp Allstars" rather than VBS, but fundamentally... things haven't changed that much.  I was the official Camp Storyteller this week, and we learned five parables that Jesus taught when he walked on the earth.  Then we played kickball and made crafts out of popsicle sticks.  See?  Not so different.

We learned in one of the parables, that it's important to be PERSISTENT with our prayers.  (Parable of the Friend at Midnight, Luke chapter 11).  As I told that parable to the kids, I realized that those of us on Team Keaton have been praying steadily for over a year now.  And then I got a lump the size of Texas in my throat as I realized how faithful God has been. Keaton is doing remarkably well.  He's healing from the latest surgery, his most recent MRI looks really, really good and he'll be training soon for his senior season of high school football.

My son is taking the parable to heart, and his Red Team at Camp Allstars has been persistently praying for Keaton all week.  Let's keep it up until the words "Cancer" and "Keaton" are no longer mentioned in the same sentence!

For those of you who grew up attending or teaching VBS... I thought you might enjoy a little trip down memory lane by viewing this short video I put together from our camp this week.  Enjoy!

Keaton Update

My friend TG is very fond of saying, "God is everywhere, but Jesus lives in Guatemala."  I was suspect of this claim of hers, being the spiritually-mature, bible scholar that I am  (yeah, right) until I accompanied her on a couple of medical mission trips to Guatemala.   Then I began to believe there MIGHT just be some merit to her assertion, despite all the theological obstacles to it.

Others in my life took exception to this of course.  My best girlfriend of 22 years, for example, is convinced that Jesus lives in KENYA where she has seen evidence of His presence on NUMEROUS trips to a particular orphanage there.  (She is willing to graciously concede that Jesus may PERHAPS have a "condo" in Guatemala - but she is firmly set that His primary residence is in Kenya.)

It's a great debate.

But today I am writing to settle the matter once and for all.  I have recently discovered indisputable evidence that IN FACT, Jesus lives in Baltimore, Maryland.  Who knew?

Last week, my whole family was able to fly up to Baltimore to visit Keaton at Johns Hopkins after his latest surgery.  While I would love to take the credit for our trip - it was actually God's idea. (I think He was tired of hearing this debate about the primary address for His son and wanted to settle the matter for us.)  It's too LONG of a story to relay here, but trust me when I tell you His fingerprints were all over it.  It's too GOOD of a story, however, not to at least hit the highlights in the blog.

The story began back in February when the deadline for the next Guatemala trip arrived.  I didn't have a good reason NOT to go, and my teenage son WANTED to go.  (Who in their right mind would turn down a teenage boy anxious to GO on a mission trip?)  Can't explain it.  Just didn't feel "free" and excited about signing up as I had felt the last two years, so I didn't.  Looked at my feet alot when people asked me why I wasn't going.  Didn't have a good answer.  Felt pretty stupid.

Found out later that my husband's firm had a meeting at the end of May on the Chesapeake Bay - families were invited.  Cool.  Maybe THAT is why I wasn't supposed to go to Guatemala to visit Jesus... I needed to be able to accompany my husband on his business trip.  As much as I want to be a GREAT wife, going on a business trip didn't seem like a good enough reason TO ME to skip out on a mission trip, ESPECIALLY given the fact that I'd be visiting Jesus' condo in Guatemala.  So I pouted... a little.  My teenager pouted ALOT.

But then we found out about Keaton's surgery.

In Baltimore.

What city had we booked our flight to from Atlanta for this business trip on the Chesapeake Bay?  Baltimore.

When was Keaton's surgery?  May 30th

When was our departure date for Keith's business trip?  May 30th

Departure Date for the Guatemala trip I said "no" to?  June 1st.  Going to Guatemala would have meant missing Keith's trip AND missing Keaton's surgery.  Knew NONE of that back in February.  Whew... that gives me goosebumps.  Pretty amazing orchestration by God isn't it?  The only reason I included that part of the story in the blog is to ENCOURAGE you.  God really DOES speak to us.  If we take the time to pray about decisions, big and small, He really WILL weigh in.  Now personally, I'd prefer something more concrete in the communication department - something OTHER THAN just a weird vibe or a nagging doubt when it's time to make the decision.  But I suppose that's why it's called FAITH.  He requires us to act before we have all the information we'd like to have to make a perfectly- informed decision.  Abraham did that, and scripture tells us it was credited to him as "righteousness."  I like the sound of that.  The key, I think, is continuing to pray and seek His input.  I still don't know all the story.  It's not like my presence in Baltimore made much of a difference, but I believe with all my heart I was in the place I was meant to be on May 30th.  And with THAT, I am satisfied.

As for Keaton, to catch you up - he's doing amazingly well!  So why another surgery?  We had a setback this past winter.  A staph infection crept in to the bone of his skull where the steel plate from surgery number one was attached.  (Surgery "number one" successfully removed the biggest of two tumors last August.)  After the infection was discovered, another surgery ensued to temporarily remove the steel plate, plus remove the infected portion of the actual skull.  Emotionally this was tough as it knocked our Strong Warrior out of Spring Football.  But he persevered.  After enough antibiotics to wipe out all infection along the entire eastern seaboard, Keaton was declared Infection Free.  This last surgery at John's Hopkins was simply to re-install a new and improved steel plate.  If all heals according to plan, our favorite O-Lineman will be back in his helmet in about four weeks.  Would appreciate a prayer to that effect!

Now to settle the matter that began this blog post.  Where does Jesus live, REALLY?  When we arrived at Johns Hopkins last week, Keaton was just getting out of surgery.  He was in recovery and doing well.  His dad, Miles, took us on a little tour of the hospital.  It's a fascinating place.  It has a very "modern" side, which is very new and stainless steel and high tech.  But BY FAR, my favorite part of the tour was through the "old" section of the hospital.



It's architecturally beautiful and stately.  I loved the contrast of the original building to the new, high tech part of the campus.  As we entered through the wrought iron gates and through the front door, there He stood, bigger than life.  It actually took my breath away.

There in the lobby, stood a solid stone carving of Jesus Christ.  He was in the middle of the "rotunda", which housed many of the original patient rooms and was the impetus of the medical phrase for doctors "making rounds."

Nothing gives a greater sense of peace than seeing Jesus in a place of desperate need.  People don't travel to Johns Hopkins for hangnails or for liposuction.  All the patients there need something supernatural - something the stainless steel and high tech side will fall short of providing.  I love that Johns Hopkins kept the sculpture despite the expansion and all the newness.  We are thankful for BOTH sides of the hospital and availed ourselves of both on this last trip.

The staff of Johns Hopkins continues to win our admiration and our affection.  We couldn't love them more.  But you see, in our human view of things, we'd rather NOT be "welcomed back" to the 10 North hallway.  But sometimes God sends ALL of us on journeys we'd rather not take.  Perhaps you are on a journey with a rebellious teen, or on a journey of unemployment, or on a journey of caring for aging parents where the needs are growing and your physical energy is waning.  I don't know your situation.  But our tour of Johns Hopkins was a visible reminder to me that He never sends us ANYWHERE without sending Jesus along with us.  And Jesus wins.  I hope that is something you can use this week, no matter your journey.

Our prayer for the summer is for complete healing for Keaton.  We are looking forward to seeing him in his #70 jersey for his senior season at Flowery Branch High School.  Thanks for continuing your membership on Team Keaton, and thanks for joining us in that prayer!

Retreat

Last weekend, I did something really cool.  I tagged along with my oldest son to our church's Middle School "Retreat."  We caravanned through a rainy Atlanta rush-hour to a county park near the Alabama state line on Friday.  We stayed in a group lodge that had seen it's better days.  No one cared.  Throughout the weekend, laughter was the most common sound.  These kids, ranging in age from 11-13, taught me how beautiful life can be when you are FULLY present in the moment.  That's the wonderful part of a "retreat" - we are removed from the ordinary distractions that compete for our attention and pull us away from the gift of the moments right in front of our faces.

I spent time with little girls who still keep diaries.

I walked around the campgrounds with camera in hand, and I saw kids genuinely seeking God during designated "quiet times."  Jeremiah 29:13 - You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

I stood on the hill and laughed as the kids threw ALL of their competitive spirit into the group games.

Wait.  That's not supposed to happen.  I'm on a RETREAT.  I'm not supposed to be focusing on anything except the moment at hand.  But you see, watching kids run and jump and play - reminds me of my nephew who is in Baltimore recovering from yet another surgery.  I feel guilty.  I don't even know from which direction the guilt comes... is it because I had the audacity to laugh and enjoy the moment at hand - meaning I must not be a very devoted aunt?  Or is it because I'm on a RETREAT and I'm not supposed to be letting my mind wander from the moment at hand - meaning I must not be a very good child of God?

These are classic signs of Satan.  Guilt.  He tries to steal our moments of joy.  I recognize it, and offer my thousandth prayer of the day for Keaton - and get back to the moment, and to the joy.  I remember that with God, it is possible to do BOTH... to be with Keaton in spirit AND be in the moment.  My best friend and I have been discussing this verse of scripture lately: "Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. - 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18.  Just three things.  Three.  (1) Be joyful.  (2) Pray.  (3) Give Thanks.  I pray for God to help me DO those three things - RIGHT NOW, and I swallow hard and raise the camera once more toward the kids.

How can I NOT give thanks for boys climbing trees? 

At night we huddled around the camp fire.  One of those little girls in my cabin - with the diary and the pink sleeping bag and pink pjs and pink toothbrush and pink suitcase?  She crawled into my lap and sat for a long time as we stared at the fire.

At night when the activities of the day subside, the mental battles begin in earnest.  I think about the next MRI.  And I wrap my arms tighter around the little girl in my lap... the girl with the long straight hair who has one foot in adolescence and one foot still in the land of pink.  I stare into the fire and I pray a Warrior Prayer.  It's my memory verse for the first half of January.  I laugh out loud as I'm praying it because I suddenly realize WHY God focused my heart on this particular verse during this particular season.  See if you can figure it out...  "You keep track of all my sorrows.  You have collected all my tears in your bottle; you have recorded each one in your book.  My enemies will RETREAT when I call to you for help.  This I know, God is on my side!" - Psalm 56:8-9.

When thoughts and fears threaten to steal the joy of the moment - those fears become enemies.  Why?  Because GOD is IN THE MOMENT.  When we mentally check out and allow the fear to the check in, we miss God.  Did you notice that the pictures representing my thoughts of Keaton during the weekend are much larger than the ones from the park?  That's how it works isn't it?  The thing right in front of us pales in comparison to the size of the thing rattling around in our head.  We need help with those enemies - the fear, the temptation to fret.  They are too big for us.

One of my jobs for the weekend was to tell a few bible stories to the kids.  We spent some time talking about that passage in Psalm 56.  Being an incredibly creative group... they came up with a "signal", sort of like a secret handshake to help us remember the most important nugget of truth in that verse.  This picture captures it.  We fold our arms and rest them over to the side.  "This I KNOW, God is on my SIDE!"

The folks in this picture bowed the head and the heart on Friday night and prayed specifically for Keaton.  I've always believed it to be a very powerful thing when kids pray for other kids.  

So, we had a great weekend and we came home.  I learned that it's good to be away on a "retreat", but it's even better when God causes my enemies to retreat. 

How did Keaton fare?  At the time of this post, he's back home in Atlanta.  His surgery to address some complications with his steel plate went great.  He recovered quickly.  He and his family stole some joy right out from under the enemy as they made the best of things in Baltimore.  (Some non-institutional food was consumed, and that's all I'm going to say about it.)  So, to keep it real... here's the bad news: Keaton has some ongoing swelling in his brain.  The doctors have a new gameplan to address that.  He also has an infection that needs to go away.  We have antibiotics and plan to fight with the pill and fight on our knees.  

Are your ready for the good news?  The dreaded MRI results?  The area of Keaton's brain that hosted the very first surgery back in August - the site of the largest tumor - that area is STILL cancer-free.  AWESOME news.  The remaining tumor we've been attacking with radiation, chemo, and warrior prayers?  That tumor is DEAD.  Can you still see remnants of it on the MRI?  Yes.  But it's dead as a door nail.  We are in awe of the kindness of God!!

Are there still hurdles to jump?  Yes.  But TODAY - we celebrate and we choose to do THREE things.  You know what they are. 

We choose to focus on the size of our God and the fact that He is flexing His muscles on behalf of Keaton... rather than focus on the size of the remaining hurdles .  And in making that CHOICE, our enemies will RETREAT. 

Christmas With Cancer

It was scandalous – that thing she did on impulse.  Never had such a move been executed under our roof.  I remember feeling almost fearful in my little five year-old heart.  I didn’t quite know what to make of it.  I only knew FOR SURE that if I had done it myself, there would be a swift and severe spanking.  But when the parent commits the crime – well, that was new territory for me and I just stood there in front of the Christmas tree completely bewildered.  I didn’t understand it until she started laughing and hugging me.

The Christmas tree in my childhood living room was silver – adorned with white lights and bright blue ball ornaments.  There was a spotlight shining on the tree from about two feet away.  The spotlight had an electric rotating cover on it.  Anybody remember those?  The cover was hard plastic and had four colored sections shaped like pie wedges.  As the cover slowly rotated, the tree appeared to change colors: red, blue, green, and yellow.  To me, it was magical and wonderful and I felt rich in all the ways that mattered.

My understanding of my reality was very limited at age 5.  I didn’t know my mother was critically ill with cancer.  And I especially didn’t know that by the next Christmas, she’d be gone.  What I DID know was that when she walked up to the Christmas tree and pulled out a gift that was beautifully wrapped for my cousin Becky in Florida and began ripping the paper off - all crazy like – something must be terribly wrong.  But then she started laughing, and pulled a spiffy new outfit from the box just my size (my cousin and I were twins at heart.)  She impulsively decided in that moment that she wanted to see her own pig-tailed daughter in that outfit, and it suddenly occurred to her that she had the power to do just that.  So she did.  And I have never felt more spoiled or more loved.  I can see the whole thing in my mind like it was yesterday. 

My mother knew what was important when you are celebrating Christmas with cancer.  She chose love and joy and to be fully present in the moment.  And that choice left a legacy.  I certainly don't hit the mark every single time, but thanks to her - I keep the beauty of a life lived that way in my mind and heart.  It's my goal.

Cancer came to our household for Christmas again this year.  We gathered at the farmhouse in south Georgia, as is our tradition, all eighteen of us.  Keaton was feeling good, thanks to a reprieve from so many of the harsh treatment drugs, for at least a season.  You know what we did for four solid days?  We chose love and joy and to be fully present in the moment.  We ate like pigs, we played cops and robbers on farm vehicles, we went for jogs on the dirt roads, and we visited extended family.  It was a gift of time together.

You see… when you celebrate Christmas with cancer, it’s important to focus on the WITH, not the cancer.  Christmas is God WITH us, Emmanuel. 

Jesus entered our mess of a world, not just to save us from hell – but to save us from a life of misery – no matter what we’re facing.  And I don’t say that flippantly.  There are people out there facing A LOT.  One of the most impactful things I read this Christmas season was an article on the enormity of God “WITH” us.  The writer stated simply that the best way to wrap our hearts around the “with” of the season is to spend some time reflecting on without.  Now THAT is something we all have experience with in this fallen world.  Keaton knows what it is to be without perfect health as a teenager.  I know how it feels to be without a mother at age six.  Single moms know the struggle of raising kids without a spouse.  Parents in Newtown know the pain of being without their kids this year.  If we understand the pain of without… we can begin to be grateful for the gift of God WITH us. 

How does it work?  This “with” thing?  How do you take it off the pages of scripture and bring it into your reality?  How does a sermon become something that actually soothes – actually makes a difference?  How do you celebrate Christmas with cancer and REALLY choose love and joy and be fully present in the moment, rather than fret and lose the moment to fear?  

There’s a one word answer… surrender.  It’s bending the knee and telling God you really, really need the “with” part.  It’s acknowledging a need that you can’t fix alone. 

And it’s confessing that you need other people to help light the way.  That’s one of the great privileges of being a Christian.   You weren't meant to travel the road alone.

In Keaton’s case… it’s the Gray Bracelet Brigade.  There’s work to be done gang.  Keaton’s MRI is THIS Thursday morning at 6:30am. (Dec 27^th)  Prayers are needed.  If you’ve been keeping up with the blog, you know the specific prayer request: for the brain tumor to continue shrinking and for the other “spots” to be conclusively labeled as non-cancerous.  Thank you for praying!

But what if YOUR cancer this Christmas isn’t the physical kind?  There are all kinds of “emotional cancer” – bitterness, the ache of loss, the sting of rejection, loneliness, or just plain feeling lost in a big world – to name a few.  For any of you reading this who are feeling the pain of without, my prayer for you is that the WITH of Christmas, Emmanuel, will enter your struggle and bring His comfort.  You do your part: bend the knee and open your heart to hope.  He’ll be faithful.   "O come to us.  Abide with us.  Our Lord Emmanuel."

Merry Christmas everyone, and remember to pray for Keaton!

Joy to the World

I love the early mornings, especially this time of year.  I love coming downstairs when the rest of the world is still and quiet and dark.  And I love tiptoeing around the corner at the bottom of the stairs where I am greeted by the soft light of the Christmas tree.  My heart floods with all the TRUTHS of Christmas.  He really IS the "light of the world."  And more importantly, He really IS "God WITH us."  Those truths tend to get drowned out by the noise of our modern traditions, don't they?

In the glow of the Christmas tree lights in the early morning stillness, I am able to re-calibrate my mind.  I can put the reality of last night's decorating fiasco behind me.  (Do you remember decorating your tree with LOTS of help from your kids?!)   The tangled cords of lights threaten to strangle the joy right OUT of you.  The fighting over who gets to hang what "special" ornament is louder than the Christmas music I have playing on the stereo.  And how did EVERY ornament get to be "special?"   

But in the stillness of morning, I am able to remember that God won't ask me how perfect my Christmas tree looked in 2012... but He might ask me how perfectly I enjoyed the gift of time with my children.  I can see it - the wisdom of THAT question - in the early morning light.  And I am thankful that His mercies are new every morning.  I think back to last evening and remember the fun parts... the boys re-living Christmases past and dancing around the room to their favorite Christmas songs.  And then there's my youngest - our natural comedian - climbing atop the step ladder to lip sync "Silver Bells" as though he were Bing Crosby incarnate.  It really WAS a fun night.  I can see it now.

I wanted to give you an update on Keaton's MRI and his time with the medical team at Emory yesterday.  Frankly, I needed a night to sleep on it before I could sort through my emotions.  It was a bit like Christmas tree decorating.  Parts of the report were tangled up like strands of lights, but in the clarity of morning light, I am able to see the GIFT of the medical report.  It's the "first gift of Christmas" for you Polar Express fans out there.

Keaton's tumor is shrinking!!!  I don't often prefer the official medical terminology in most cases, but in this situation I do.  The doctors phrase it this way: "We are pleased with the progress in the destruction of the tumor."  Destruction is a GREAT word!  There is a meeting on Tuesday to inform us of the treatment plan to finish off that tumor.  

The MRI was a bit pesky.  There are a couple of new spots on the brain, but the doctors feel quite certain that those spots are NOT new tumors - but rather just patches of "radiation residue."  Keaton will have another MRI in two weeks to bolster that theory.  So that's the prayer between now and then!

As you know, cancer "treatments" are done with very strong drugs.  Anything strong enough to kill cancer cells is bound to do some "collateral damage."  The radiation, which DID shrink the tumor, has also caused some mild brain swelling.  The doctors gave Keaton some steroids to help with THAT, and so we continue to move forward!

I've been studying the Passover from scripture lately - an odd thing for this time of year, I know.  As I was listening to a podcast on the topic from one of my favorite Bible teachers, he said, "We don't spend NEARLY enough time thanking God for all the things He causes to PASS OVER us."  I think about that this morning in the glow of the Christmas tree.  And my gratitude RISES as I think of the medical report we COULD HAVE GOTTEN yesterday.  "The tumor is growing despite our best efforts."  By God's grace, THAT report passed over us.

You know what I've found to be true - not just true at Christmas but ALL the time?  As gratitude RISES, so does JOY.

We've looked at a few characters from scripture as we've chronicled Keaton's journey though cancer.  Gideon, Nehemiah, and King Jehoshaphat.  Here's what THEY did when God caused bad outcomes to pass over THEM:

Judges 7:15 "Gideon worshiped God."

Nehemiah 12:40 - Nehemiah organized a big ole Praise and Worship service! "The two choirs gave thanks.  The sound of rejoicing in Jerusalem could be heard far away."

2 Chronicles 20:27 - "Then, led by Jehoshaphat, all the men of Judah and Jerusalem returned joyfully to Jerusalem, for the LORD had given them cause to rejoice over their enemies.  They entered Jerusalem and went to the temple of the LORD with harps and lutes and trumpets."

Want some more JOY in your world this holiday season?  Spend some time giving THANKS.   I am thankful for all the prayers offered up by those who proudly wear the colors of Team Keaton.  And I am unspeakably grateful that we have a God who delights to answer the prayers of His children.  Please don't stop.  Let's pray together that the MRI two weeks from now will confirm the theory that there are NO new tumors!

And in the stillness of this morning, Thank you Father, for the first gift under my slightly-lopsided Christmas tree:  "We are pleased with the progress in the destruction of the tumor."

Thanksgiving in the Country

 Thanksgiving in the country is good for the soul.  We spent time with family and intentionally slowed down.  We went for walks in wide open spaces and took time to actually BE thankful.  

Personally, I just looked UP alot.  We've been waiting on Keaton's MRI to let us know where things stand.  Waiting is hard.  Scripture has helped me understand that we are actually waiting on God.

Lamentations 3:25-26 "The Lord is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him.  It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the Lord."  (sometimes you just need the old King James version of a verse.)

Here's what that verse looks like in the land of dirt roads:

Keaton's MRI has been moved UP to Thursday 11/29/12 at 4:30pm.  If you see this in time, we'd love it if you would send up a prayer on his behalf.  Keaton and his parents will meet with the medical team on Friday to get the results.

"I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.  Wait for the LORD, be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD." - Psalm 27:13-14